dumb stuff

why I want this cycle to work out: peace of mind, ease of process, $

if it doesn't i will try to remember these dumb positive things: I will have more time to lose weight (before getting pregnant) and I won't have a baby born right around L

I feel ridiculous even thinking about those things when there will be bigger concerns like ivf working and avoiding having another preemie... but you can't take the girl out of the infertile

Back at it

Yesterday I went back to my RE to check in.  See what needs to happen for #2.  I don't know when exactly, but he said I can start as soon as Feb. but not to wait much longer than a year.  I'm on progesterone to induce a period, cause despite my optimistic previous post.. the bleeding I had wasn't a true period. I haven't had a period since L was born 13 months ago.  And now since I haven't lost most of the baby weight, I'm about 25 lbs heavier than when I started my last couple fresh cycles.  I'm technically obese. Though I don't think losing a few pounds will greatly change the outcome of my ivf or pregnancy, I'm trying.  Pretty hardcore.  Because I am not someone who can casually lose weight.  The last few months have reinforced that fact.  So now I have to figure out exactly when to start, but I'm sure it'll be sooner rather than later. I was surprised to feel excited to be back at the RE's.  not full of dread, not depressed, no tears. Hopefully I'l be lucky and avoid those feeling this time around.