And we're off!

I just took my first Lupron shot and Dexamethasone pill.  I feel excited.  So dumb, but I do.  I've been working out w/trainer/eating right since i got back from Portland and I already feel so much better... so going to try and keep it up while cycling.  Without over do-ing it/hurting myself/getting in the way of my f-ing eggs thriving.

I decided to track my weight during the cycle.  I was going to keep a separate log of it, then thought "what if I do that on my blog?"  Then I thought I didn't want people to see it.  But whoever finds their way here is seeing way more personal stuff than that...

So, today before my shot I weighed 149.2.  That's still up 3 lbs from before last cycle.  BTW, I was around 135 when I started IVF a year ago which I thought was a high weight for me then (I'm just under 5'1).

So I haven't gotten that weight off and I'm already going back at it.  I figure by keeping track of my weight honestly here... I will be more accountable so I don't eat my way through this cycle.  Especially with the Dex which on the side of the bottle tells you it may result in insomnia and increased appetite.  Plus that pesky side effect of weight gain.  If I sound weight obsessed... I always am.  But the past 4 months it has shot up so quickly, I feel like focusing on it and actually DOING something about it is a good thing.

So for the next month... the goal is to MAINTAIN.  Depressing?  Yes.  But less depressing than if I wound up gaining again.  It's also something I'd want to do even if I weren't cycling.  I'm learning (over and over again) it's important to try and hold on to the part of yourself that exists outside of ivf because it's easy to let who you were pre-IF slip away and become bogged down with the shit storm.