5 weeks

Today I'm 5 weeks pregnant.  I think.  It's five weeks from retrieval which some timelines go by ( a couple said yesterday was it)... this makes sense.  I'm going with it.  So... 5 weeks.  I don't feel pregnant at all. The nausea has been gone for 2 days.  There's no black and white sign.  I have this lingering sadness.... just waiting for next Thurs.'s ultrasound to tell me we're still in this.  I'm trying to stay positive which mostly means ignoring as much as I can that I'm supposed to be pregnant.  I'm trying to eat right in case.  Trying to drink water and get as much sleep as I can.  But I don't even feel as tired as I did thru Monday.    It could all be nothing so I'm trying not to dwell on this shit.  Don't want to spend 9 months (if I get that far) feeling sad and worried.  I promise if next Thur's ultrasound is good to try and take that as a victory and not immediately jump to when do we see a heartbeat.  Or I promise to try :)